The Zombie Bar Crawl on Sunday was pretty nuts. And I want to go into the whole thing in detail but I haven’t been sleeping at all and when I started typing this all the letters went sideways and nothing was making any sense. So when I wake up next which will probably be in like 3 hours I am going to finish this post, but in the mean time I will just leave you with the pictures. Rated NSFW for both nudity and adult situations.
UPDATE: Okay, let’s do this. I am wide awake now…
So after a late brunch at Moto I made my way over to the Charleston on Bedford where the zombies were turning themselves into zombies. My man Doug Sakmann and his Backseat Conceptions crew were reading the troupes and applying horrifying amounts of gore to people. Outside the zombies grew rowdy. On my way up the block just about everyone I passed was wondering what the hell was going on. The zombies were attacking cars and buses and filling the streets. As they were mobbing the bus a cop showed up and tried to get the crowd to disperse. As I looked again I realize he didn’t have a gun and his ironic mustache didn’t look quite right. Okay, so it was a fake cop, but he had a real uniform on and I think he kept people from calling the actual cops. Because despite the zombies blocking off all of Bedford and doing all manor of horrible things in the park we only saw one cop car all day and they just drove slowly by looking very confused.
So the zombies walked all the way down Bedford to McCarren Park where they crossed the park to a shady spot under some trees. During this trek across the park all the hundreds of people standing around had a great time laughing and pointing at the zombie hoard. There were at least 200 people strong staggering through the park. When they got to the baseball fields they walked through the outfield that separated two softball games in progress. The people playing on the southern end of the park were making jokes and didn’t seem to mind the less than 5 minute delay in their game while everyone walked through. The teams on the northern side started yelling at the zombies and eventually started hitting balls into the crowd. It was insane. They hit between 5 and 10 balls at the zombies. One came inches from my head. Another ball hit a girl in the leg knocking her to the ground and giving her a huge welt. If one of those balls had hit someone it could have been deadly. Doug grabbed one of the balls and held it up to the zombies and poured fake blood on to it. When one of the outfielders saw this he started yelling and tried to get his ball. After almost having my head taken off and seeing this 100 lb girl get nearly crippled I had had enough and started getting in this guys face. I am not sure what the hell the baseball players were thinking but there were 20 of them, 200 of us and we had the DisgraceLand Hook Squad with us and they are a bunch of motherfuckers I wouldn’t mess with.
After that drama was over it was time for DisgraceLand to put on a show. I have shot these guys a bunch of times before and if there is one thing they are good at it is scaring the hell out of old people and children. They picked a far off corner of the park, but I have to say everyone felt pretty bad when we noticed families watching in horror as DisgraceLand put suspension hooks in their back and began their bloody game of tug of war. It was zombie VS human. Fortunately for humans like myself, our contestant was much bigger and took the zombie to task whipping him about the park. Doug and other DisgraceLand members tried their best to help the zombie win the flesh pull tug of war but the blood covering their hands made it impossible to hold on. I didn’t post any of this stuff on the main page because it was pretty graphic, but there is plenty of it in the gallery so you have been warned. If this image doesn’t make you vomit, then you are probably okay moving forward.
After the flesh pull there were zombie games like zombie Red Light, Green Light were the zombies had to crawl instead of running. The winner got free porn from Burning Angel. Classy as always. Backseat Conceptions makes horror films as well as all the other madness they do, so they had a blood cannon on hand and fired a few rounds at people. We took a group photo and got ice cream and relaxed for a bit and then headed back to the Charleston for beer and free pizza. Andy Rourke from the Smiths was at the Charleston and after taking photos of him being bitten by a sexy zombie I ate pizza with him and my friend Ole and some kids we met from Asheville, NC. At this point I was thinking about just shooting the shit with them and going home to sleep. You see, I had been awake for 30 hours at this point and was a bit tired after chasing zombies around in the sun all day. But Doug is one convincing guy and dragged me over to the metal bar Duff’s for an after party.
Duff’s is a few blocks from my house so I figure I could just stop by for a second and then go home, but I didn’t end up leaving until after three in the morning. I am not sure if it was just the zombie crawl, but Duff’s is amazing. I am not a huge metal fan, but my hair is finally long enough to head bang properly so I was enjoying the music. The bartenders were both super hot and covered in blood. They, along with another lady put on quite a blood filled show for my camera on the bar. Doug wrote DBB on one of the girls chest in fake blood and everyone was slipping all over the place. Not many people made it to the after party, but the people who did and an amazing time. We were doing sing a longs and Jimmy Duff was there and got quite the kick out of zombie boobs (again, NSFW) and shit just got wild. This weird gypsy band from New Orleans called Ruby Ruby Ruse played and everyone danced and fell about the place like mad men. The bar was playing Deadly Weapons which is this amazing Dorris Wishman sexploitation film starring Chesty Morgan who kills people with her freakishly huge breasts. I lectured these two cute girls on the history of exploitation cinema which was super fun to do because I rarely get to rant at people about Mondo films or the oeuvre of Jack Hill. After that I pulled this crazy punk rock chick into the bathroom for some dirty photos. I had met her at past zombie crawls and we had talked about shooting her naked before, but in more of a studio setting, not in the bathroom of a metal bar. Still, that is always fun. Those shots will be up later tonight (here they are!), so just hold your horses. After that I went home and slept for about 4 hours before waking up for absolutely no reason. Insomnia is even worse than zombification.
Okay, so it was a long crazy adventure. I was shooting zombies from 4pm to 3am and I took about 800 pictures of sex, violence (both real and imaginary) and rock and roll. It was a great day and I can’t wait for the next one. Click here to see all the pictures.
PS. For more information on the next New York Zombie Crawl check them out at their website or follow them on Twitter. And as always, you can follow me on Twitter here.
