I hadn’t done much of anything so far in LA.  It has been pretty much been a vacation.  A few people told me I needed to check out Cinespace on Tuesdays so I did.  I have to say these kids party pretty hard.  The DJ’s were killing it and kids did not stop dancing all night.  Given the bars close at 2, but it was still pretty rad seeing people dancing until they kicked everyone out.  This chick from America’s Next Top Model sang a set at some point.  I have no idea who she is or what that show is about, but I googled her and her name is Lisa D’Amato and she was honestly pretty fucking on.  Totally rad.

Another thing to note about LA is that there are sooooo many fucking photobloggers.  Like at least 15 were there.  That is no joke.  15.  And despite this people kept pulling on me to get me to take their photo.  That happens maybe once a night in NYC and it happened at least a dozen times last night.  A lot of photobloggers hate when people ask them to take their picture, personally I love it because I know those kids are the ones who are getting the most out of my site.  I actually met a few people who knew who I was which was cool.  Over all a dope time.  The girl I was hanging out with got really drunk and I had to deal with that for the two hours that followed the party, but over all a good night.  Click for REAL LIVE LA PARTY PIX!

PS.  All you LA kids who got my card last night, add me to your myspace pages so I can let you know when I will be back next and you can let me know what the fuck I should be doing.

So I am in LA. I have no idea where I am going to be staying the whole time I am in LA so it is probably a mystery to where I am at this very moment. I have 10 friends who told me I could stay with them, but who knows who picked up their phone last night when I needed a place to stay. This is all speculation since I am writing this post a week ago.

I sometimes wish I knew how to DJ so I could do a mash up between these two songs… or at least a sweet mix in. I am sure I am not the first to note the similarities of these incredibly high concept hits, but I just wanted to bring it up anyway. I was looking through old bookmarks when I realized I had both these videos saved. They are both so good and yet so completely stupid. It’s almost like that time when I spent the last several years of my life obsessed with sneakers after I heard Nelly’s Air Force 1’s. At first I thought the song was so dumb that it was hilarious and then I started listening to it over and over again and then buying the album and then only buying Nike high tops for rest of my life. Anyway if someone could send me a mash up or even better a video mash up of Kid Sister’s Pro Nails mixed up with Lil Mama’s Lip Gloss I would be eternally grateful.

Pro Nails Lyrics
Lip Gloss Lyrics

[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=tIYfBIw-QbM[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCvXzjGRnKc[/youtube]

Edit: They disabled embeding on the Lil Mama video.. you can see it here.

I just spent the last 20 minutes driving around LA trying to find a WIFI network that was open.  I am currently sitting in a CVS parkinglot killing an hour before I have to pick up a friend of mine from LAX.  We are going out dancing somewhere I think.  I may or may not have pictures for you in the near future. Anyway…

Celebrating the one year anniversary of the Pull-Out Method party at Midway (Ave B between 2nd and 3rd) the Gaskets are going to be playing.  It is going to rule and I hope you guys show up.  Unfortunately I am going to be at Sundance and I am going to miss the show, but I think you will have a dancing good time if you go.  They are going on at 11 so you can still go out after.  Trust me, you will have a lot of fun.

I actually got some sleep last night, and I didn’t take any photos last night.  I am just sort of hanging out.  I think I’ll be shooting a party tonight maybe, but I am also sort of enjoying not doing anything.  Yesterday I went over to VividAlt and hung out with Eon McKai who is my favorite porn director.  He just kept handing me free porn… I don’t think I will ever be able to watch all of it.  Whoever checks my bag at the airport is going to be amused with the huge stack of porn.  I then went and hung out with my brothers friend Toby who is awesome.  We watched 3 Ninjas: High Noon At Mega Mountain and determined it to be the worst film ever made despite the appearance of such legends as Hulk Holgan, Loni Anderson and Jim Varney.  I think hung out with former New Yorker Lauren Foust and we drove around the Hollywood hills for like an hour after making some pit stopps at some hipster bars.  Good times.  I have nothing else to update you with though, so I apologize for that, but I will leave you with this 3 Ninjas rant I found.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNWnCSJB9kM[/youtube]

I saw these videos posted in a Gawker article about Tracy Morgan.  I had not seen them before.  When I met him I sort of got the idea that he might have been a little bit closer to his 30 Rock Tracy Jordan character than one might assume.  These videos are not new, but they are hilarious and they do illustrate the fact that he is out of his fucking mind… but in a really good way.  He is welcome at my wedding.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXz16nqmLPc&watch_response[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DOhKrL5DB1Y[/youtube]

Since I was staying in the Circus Circus clown casino I knew I wanted to shoot in there so I brought this scary clown mask I had. I met this girl Toryn on Gods Girls and we shot a bunch of clown pictures which will be up when I get back, but we made this hilarious video. It is not really clown porn, in fact it is very tame and not very sexy, but it is pretty amazing anyway. We are pretty brilliant people.

I would not watch this video at work unless your boss is really into ICP.

Clown Porn A-Go-Go – Watch more free videos

Chris Angel is a fucking pussy. Derren Brown is this British magician who doesn’t do illusions. He actually tricks people into doing shit with his mind. He does hypnotism and cold reading and has a photographic memory and uses all these things just to mess with people. There are a million clips of him on YouTube so I recommend you check them out. He puts people to sleep over the telephone and steals peoples wallets. All of these things are way more interesting than levitation or some bullshit with white tigers. I seriously hate magic, but I am very interested in the way the human mind works and how you can use that to steal from people and fuck up their lives. Some of his stuff is probably bullshit, and he admits that some of it is fake, but it is still pretty impressive. In the most amazing clip below he uses hypnotism and subliminal messages to force normal people into robbing an armored car. It is mind blowing.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p958woXcYcI[/youtube]

My day started out really shitty. I couldn’t sleep and then there was some drama that put me in a horrible mood. I tried to take a nap but I just felt bad. I had to do some apologizing and I still don’t feel right about it. I just feel like a prick. Anyway, the people I was trying to get in touch with were clearly wasted and sending me weird texts and calls. I though about just going to sleep but Keith Crass called me and him and Joe Gallant and some kids from Seattle went back to the fetish party I was at last night. I am not a fetishist, so I felt slightly out of place, but I have to give that scene credit, it was fucking impressive. I have shot a few Byte’s before, and I think anyone who knows my site knows I am very into subculture, but this is a whole other level. I saw fisting, squirting and all sorts of unmentionable things and I met some amazing people. It is points like this in my life when I wish I wasn’t so desensitized, because I saw some crazy stuff that I sort of just took in very casually. There were no cameras allowed without a pass, but tons of people were pulling out little point and shoot digital cameras. I just really wanted to take pictures as I always do, and some people told me it would probably be alright if I just pulled some people to the side. So if I met a really cool or interesting person I pulled them off in the corner to take their picture. I wanted to respect the party. I met this amazing old school porn star named Cara Lott. She was so fresh. The unfortunate thing was at the end of the night I asked this most adorable girl if I could take her picture. She was one of the hosts and they told me I was not allowed to take any photos, so I decided to call it a night. I thought the people who asked me not to take pictures were very reasonable and I thought we had a nice talk. Then 10 min later five min before I was about to leave they asked me to leave, which really put a damper on what had been a pretty amazing night. I was feeling pretty bad about this, but then I went down stairs to the casino, had a really good talk with James Deen and found a 20 dollar bill. I put it into the first slot machine I saw and played the money till I was down to one dollar left. On the last spin I won the 25x jackpot and walked out of the casino with $25. I beat Vegas. Also on the way out I ran into Mystery again and got a picture of him and this amazingly adorable girl. He was doing is PUA shit and we took photos of them kissing and being fun… but then of all things she asked me for my number to hang out while I am in LA. I am sure she will never call me, and I feel like an asshole for not getting her number, but it was still a nice way to end a very weird night. I did not take many photos at all because of my camera restrictions, but there are some nice ones in this set.

Right now I should be driving west from Vegas to Los Angels.  The drive made famous by Fear And Loathing in Las Vegas.  Let’s just hope I am not seeing any bats at this very second.  It is my favorite book, by my favorite author which was made into one of my favorite movies starring two of my favorite actors directed by one of the few substantial directors who’s entire body of work I have covered.  So in honor of the drive that I am making at this very second, here is the opening scene to Fear and Loathing.  They are actually driving to Vegas from LA, and not the other way around, but it’s the same damn thing.  I probably have less drugs in my rental car though…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5q-N4_tQ1R8[/youtube]