It was a night of birthdays.  Jayme was in NYC for her birthday and Sasha was celebrating her’s at Bleach.  I stopped by High Voltage on the way, as it is usually my favorite party of the week.  Good times were had at both.  Lots of cake.  I usually just post one photo with these posts, but I had to get one of both birthday girls, just because I am nice like that.  Happy birthday kids.

Years ago I got a screener copy of Troma Films “All The Love You Cannes”. It was a documentary about one of Troma’s yearly trips to the Cannes film festival. It was meant to be an instructional guide on how to promote your independent feature at Cannes. What it turned out to be was an hour and a half of Doug Sakmann fucking shit up. The movie was so funny. This guy Doug who worked at Troma pissed off or pissed on anyone who came near him. He was brilliant. I suddenly was a huge fan. I emailed Doug as soon as I finished watching it to tell him how great I thought it was. He sent me tons of other Troma movies to review for Driven By Boredom, but soon after that he parted ways with Troma to start his own company, Backseat Conceptions. Anyway years later Doug and I have become friends. I have followed his career since the beginning and I have to say I am pretty pleased with his choices. I sat down and interviewed Doug in January on his way back from the Adult Video News Awards in Las Vegas. He was with one of his collaborators, Joanna Angel promoting her porn films. Her film Joanna’s Angels 2 had won Best Sex Comedy and her discovery Tommy Pistol had won best male newcomer. But let’s start at the beginning: Doug’s life post Troma.

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There was a short lived DBB 2.0 in between my old site and this new one here.  There were really only 3 good posts on the whole site.  I am going to post two of them, because one was just a food review.  Okay, here is part 1, my review of Life Like Animals.  Tomorrow I will post part two, my review of Frank Zappa pennies!?  You will have to be here tomorrow to find out what the hell that means.

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I do not even know where to begin. I was in the Kroger supermarket (4 out of 5 for being open till midnight) with a friend of mine (4 out of 5 for looking really good naked). She was buying food; I was bored and trying not to spend any money on frozen skrimps (aka shrimp). As she shopped I looked around the store and complained loudly about my friend’s decision to go vegetarian. I made sure to complain extra loud when passing the vegan hippy punk rockers complaining about meat broth in soup. Anyway, my hatred for vegetarians and love for bacon is not the issue here. The issue is Life-Like Animals. These animals were sitting on the shelf for a paltry $2.99 (for the record I got the girl I was with to pay for them anyway). These things really freaked me out. They came in 6 flavors: Chicken, Alley Rat, Dragon, Alligator, Fly and Tarantula. I of course could not live with out a miniature rubber chicken keychain and I put it in the shopping cart.

I think the packaging could be the best part of these toys. First of all, the price tag clearly notes that these key chains should be stocked in the juice isle. I can not figure out what they had to do with juice, but there they were. Secondly the package mentions that they are stretchable. This is not a lie. They are in fact so stretchy that the second I got them home they immediately stretched out of the key chain. To some this might be defective, but for me I was much happier to have them out of their oppressive keychain shackles. The most important part of the packaging is what one might call the “sell”. You want to buy this product because it: a) Looks Alive! b) Feels Alive! and c) are as I proved earlier Stretchable! While I did not really think they felt that alive, the woman who rang them up felt very differently. When she was handed the key chains she screamed and nearly threw it at the woman bagging up the items. She truly believed that they were alive. In actuality they feel less alive that they do miniature stress balls, if they made stress balls out of disgusting, sticky poor quality rubber. The other thing that confused me was the part about them looking alive. While I must admit they have some similarities to smaller versions of things that once lived, the chicken most certainly looked not alive. I would go as far as saying he looked dead. I mean, I have never seen a living chicken that was fully plucked and hanging to a key chain by his neck. But hey, I haven’t spent a ton of time on chicken farms, so you never know.

Over all, I was very excited to get these creatures today; however, unfortunately I am going to have to give them a rating of 0-3 out of a possible 5 frowning babies.

Back in the day people used to send me all sorts of fan signs. This was the cool thing to do at some point. What would happen would be some naked girl would send me some picture with my website on her boobs and then I would link her. She would get traffic, and people would come to my site because I had boobs on it. It was a good system and everyone loved it. However, these days I do not know any cam girls or anything like that. I don’t hang out on the stileproject forums or anything. I also don’t drive as much traffic… yet. So fan signs for me might be a little hard to come by. That being said, if you want to send me one, I will post it. That is for sure. I will probably talk some friends into doing it too. Enjoy the fan boobs.

PS. I know there has been a lot of nudity on my site recently. I just have received some big links from adult websites, so I am trying to keep those visitors happy. While there will always be some nudity on this site, once these links die off, there will be less of it on the front page. That being said, if you are here for the nudity, don’t worry… I will still hook it up once in a while.

You might want to skip this post.  It is not funny or entertaining.  I am just very thirsty.

Vitamin Water is my new addiction.  See the thing is, I love root beer.  It is the only thing I used to ever drink.  I just drank tons of it. In 2000 I got a root beer tattoo! The problem with root beer is that it is not that thirst quenching.  One day I tried the Arizona 24oz watermelon drink and I was pretty much hooked.  It was only $.99.  It was quite thirst quenching.  Then I tried the orange, and while not as delicious was more thirst quenching.  I was drinking about three of these a day.  The thing is, they are nothing but sugar, and have 300 calories.  That means that I am drinking 900 calories a day.  That cannot be healthy.  Recently I got sick, so I tried a Vitamin water instead of my orange drink.  It was both delicious and thirst quenching.  It cost $.50 more than the orange drink, but has only 150 calories and may actually be good for me and not bad for me.  So, now, I am addicted to the Power – C Vitamin Water.  And I think I am going to get some now… but I am keeping my root beer tattoo.

So I was watching Grindhouse as I mentioned in an earlier post and they reference a movie called Vanishing Point several times. I IMDBed and it seemed like a classic film that I had some how completely missed. Well I watched it last night and I was pretty much blown away. The film was shot by the same guy who shot Chinatown, John Alanzo and it showed. I thought the film was absolutely stunning. The story is basically about a guy (Kowalski) driving as fast as he can across America, mostly just to piss off the man. It was clearly made on the coat tails of Easy Rider but I found it more accessible and much more watchable than Monty Hellman’s Two Lane Black Top, which I loved. There are a lot of great 70’s car films, but with the exception of Death Race 2000 (top 25 movies of all time in my mind) it is probably my favorite. Cleavon Little is so good as a blind DJ, leading Kowalski through his adventure by playing amazing music and damning the man. Anyway, it’s great, put it on your Netflix list today. Yeah. Existential car chases to the max.

Also, the trailer is mind blowing. Check it:

When I was 15 my favorite band was an Alexandria, VA punk band called the Neurotiks. I started a zine and a record label just so I could work with them and other local band that I loved so much. In June of 1996 I put out Raise the Flag HarDCore Vol. 1. My favorite track on that record was Destroy by the Neurotiks. The fact that my favorite band was on my record was what punk rock was all about to me. It meant so much that I hung out every day with my favorite musicians. Yesterday, I found this video for Destroy that those guys made in 1995. I can’t tell you how excited I was about it. You may not care, but man… this song means so much to me. I have watched it 10 times since then. I hope you enjoy this blast from my past.

Alex English turned older at M @ The Annex last night.  Some guy yelled at me for taking a picture of him so I deleted it, accidentally deleting all the pictures in the process. Luckily I restored most of the images.  I missed a few and some got screwed up, but I got most of it.  I met this cute girl (below) who showed me her stomach, but she made a weird face in every picture so you might not be able to tell that she is cute.  Blame her, not me.  I am not the type of photographer who goes around making people look pretty!

PHOTO REMOVED…

So I have been talking about this video forever. Once at a party my friend Dylan and I swallowed hot dogs whole. All of that is on video somewhere. If I can ever get it off these tapes I have it will be amazing. A few years ago I made the below video. I thought it was lost, but I found it yesterday and put it on YouTube. It may be the best thing on the internet. You are going to want to view it over and over again to get the full effect. Turn your volume up. Gulp!

PS. I have never given a blow job, nor do I plan on giving one. Thanks for asking.