Alexander Ovechkin

I left NYC for a few days to go watch a Washington Capitals playoff hockey game in DC which is odd because they are playing the New York Rangers and I could just see them in NYC on Monday but whatever. The game was awesome, the Caps won and I will be back in NYC soon, but I realized I haven’t updated my site in far too long. I have some boobs that could go up but I will save them for Monday or Tuesday. So I came up with an idea for a post.

Even if you don’t like sports, you have to love Alexander Ovechkin. Not only is he one of the best hockey players in the world, but he is also hilarious. He is an insane Russian man who when given the key to the city of Washington DC, declared that there would no longer be speed limits. He is engaged to a hot Russian tennis star and he has a missing tooth which makes him look amazing. I tell people who don’t like hockey about him all the time and I pull up a bunch of videos on YouTube to explain his greatness, very little of it having to do with hockey. I am gonna start with just some highlights to show you how awesome he is at putting a little piece of rubber into a net, and then after the fold we will get into the good stuff. Trust me, this man is fucking amazing.

Alex Ovechkin has been involved in some of the best hockey related commercials of all time. The Sports Center commercial accusing him of being a Russian spy is up there with some of the great SC commercials. His terrible rendition of the local DC “Eastern Motors” jingle is historical. And his super weird series of disembodied head CCM commercials were some of the most bizarre commercials I have ever seen. If you have a product and you want to weird someone out… hire the Great 8.

One of my favorite Ovechkin moments came when he almost killed himself and one of the Caps best defensemen Mike Green by driving a golf cart full speed into a closing door Indiana Jones style. Seriously, he almost decapitated them.

Speaking of golf… the first time Ovechkin ever played golf he hit a hole in one. Seriously. He has also kicked a field goal and seems pretty good at soccer.

He was once on a Russian game show. There are a ton of weird clips of it on line, but in this one he jumps across some floating stuff to hit a gong. I can’t even explain it…

Not only is he a dynamic goal scorer but he’s also 235lbs and loves to hurt people. Apologies in advance for the music.

Pretty much every word out of the guys mouth is hilarious so there are a million more videos to look at if you YouTube him, but did I mention he is pretty good at hockey?


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Comments (2)


  1. oviesucks
    May 14th, 2013 | 3:48 am

    alex is an asshole and im glad the rangers beat them.

  2. May 15th, 2013 | 10:42 pm

    Burn in hell forever.

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