It is unbelievable how many people emailed me expressing concern for the A/S/L post. I thought it was quite clear that it was a joke, but I guess no one got it. The people who did get it didn't think it was funny and sent me hate mail. This makes me want to do more stuff like that. It is also unbelievable how much photography I have that's not on this site. I just want to get all this shit up, but I just don't have time. I have done this site almost exclusively alone, but I think I need some help to catch up. If there is anyone who wants to undertake the mindless task of organizing and fixing my images, let me know. I have been offered help a million times, I am finally accepting it if anyone wants to work for linkage or something. It is also unbelievable how funny it is when you mix unconscious people and tits.
Okay, so basically this is the last week of classes and I have so much fucking work to do. That is why this update sucks. I have 3 final projects, an exam, 100 buttons to make, and a 3 day tour with The Gaskets. I haven't slept in two days because of the CBR4 thing. I also got to make out with two girls at the same last night after the CBR4 after party and that kept me up for quite some time. I had class all day and now I just want to fucking die. I have so much shit to do to prepare for my court case so I don't go to jail and I have to deal with all sorts of drama and madness that is my daily life. I can not wait until this week is over, although the tour should be fun. But then its over and I have to get a real job for the rest of the summer, not just making buttons for pennies. God damnit, I have a paper to write first thing tomorrow am. I am going to sleep. Fuck you all. Ill try to update before the fucking tour. If you happen to live in Boston or DC you should come to one of the shows. I'll sign your tits. Heh. This shit is nuts. Yeah, stuff...
By the way... The Gaskets new album is out. You should order it, its fucking good. Tell 'em I sent ya.
If you know anything about AOL Chat rooms, then you know A/S/L means Age/Sex/Location right? Wrong. The times are changing. A/S/L has become a secret code word for Snuff film fans. Snuff fans gather in secret chat rooms around the Internet trading their films of people being fucked and killed, usually in that order. Since these videos are extremely illegal they have developed certain Internet slang to get around the FBI. For example: A/S/L actually stands for Age of the Girl In the film/ Sex (ie, Is their sex, or Is It just death) / L stands for the URL of the film. These sexual deviants also use other similarly harmless looking slang, such as LOL stands for Love Of Lesbians and L33T means that they are elite In the porn/ snuff underworld, trading hundreds of movies daily. If you see anyone using any of these code words, call the police immediately. Other words to be on the look out for: ROFL (Rape Of Female Lactating), TTFN (Terrified Teens Fucking Negros) and BRB (Bored of Raping Bitches).
So yeah, you've heard me talk about The Gaskets, you've seen the video now see the pictures. These photos were taken at Matt's pub in Richmond the second time I ever saw the band in question. And now for the first time ever, the release of the single to The Gaskets upcoming album, Big Fun. This is just a rough cut of the single, so you want to get the new mix on the CD.
Also, you can listen to their theme to the upcoming movie CBR4. Look through the journal and click the picture that says "Who is special boy?"
Anyway, I have a question for you guys. Do you want to see more pictures and crap like that, or do you want to see more ranting like the update below. In the last few days I received more feedback than normal, all praising the "Fuck Yourself" update. Anyway, you guys should let me know what you want so I can do more of that shit. Writing long rants is so much easier than cataloging 100s of photos. Oh yeah, happy Easter.
Anyway lets talk about my crazy ex-girlfriend. I went out with this girl for a week and we broke up, but evidently we didn't. Because every day she is at my house. She leaves me crazy notes. "I'M ON DRUGS YOUR NO WHERE TO BE FOUND I WANNA FUCK. Instead I'll drink half of your. rootbeer." That was found in my refrigerator. Today I came home and she was on my couch with her friend watching TV and eating my chips. Right now she is still on my couch talking to her friend and ignoring me. Today she told me "Dolemite, is too slow, so I skipped some scenes." How the fuck is Dolemite too slow? And she's a film major, she should appreciate slow films. God damn it. Why can't I meet an interesting girl who appreciates good blacksploitation. Okay, now she's bitching that I am bitching about her, so I will move on.
I will instead bitch about SARS. This is the disease people are getting from Asians. Now this is just fucking silly. There is a 4% fatality rate if you catch it, but only 3030 people have ever gotten this thing. So basically you are at about as much risk of dying from SARS as you are being crushed by a piano, yet everyone is freaking out about it. I don't even know why I am talking about this crap. No one cares. We keep killing journalists in Iraq and no one cares about that either. I really need to stop talking now, none of this is making any sense. I'm going to fucking bed. Wake me up when no one gives a fuck about SARS, Elizabeth Smart, or this silly war. We are all doomed and I can't even organize a single thought.
So since my last real update, I got a girlfriend, got arrested for shoplifting, and broke up with my girlfriend. We'll technically we haven't broken up, but I'm sure we will very soon cause she keeps lying to me. However, she took a lot of pictures of me which is the whole update. I stopped posting pictures of my self on my site, but lots of gay guys email me asking for more, so I figured I should show you what I look like. Some of these photos are old, but most are pretty new. I think the cartoon is the best and most realistic picture of me. So yeah I added like 30 pictures of me. You should enjoy them because I am hot. Speaking of me, I got interviewed by Flash News about my balls. Here's the article.
Net-Head
Turns His Testicles Into A `Ballboard'
RICHMOND, Va. (Wireless Flash) -- A man in Richmond,
Virginia, is having a
ball on his website -- and he doesn't care who sees.
The 22-year-old nethead -- known only as
"Igor" -- runs the website,
www.drivenbyboredom.com
and has a unique offer for women: "Send me a
picture of your boobs and I'll write your name on my
testicles."
He got the ballsy idea one day when he was getting lots
of shots from naked
webcam girls and felt he "should return the
favor."
It sounds nutty, but Igor says ladies seem to like
seeing their names on
his balls. Still, he can get testy, especially if the
woman has a long name.
Igor is getting lots of raves about his ""juevos""
but admits the woman
he's really nuts about is "The Rules Of
Attraction" actress Shannyn Sossaman.
He's hoping she will send him a boob shot so he can
write her name on his
nards -- even though he might run out of space.
Anyway,
because of this I am doing a bunch of interviews for
various radio stations this week. WRIF
in Detroit is interviewing me at 11 AM on Tuesday, Red
FM in Cork, Ireland is interviewing me at 6:45 PM
and at 8:10 AM on Thursday I am being interviewed by Morning
Buzz in New England. If any of you get a
chance to listen to any of that, tape it for me and send
me a copy.
Enjoy my pretty face. Fuck yourself. XOXO.
