Ebay Emails

 

Subj: Question for seller -- Item #1000266887
Date: 3/23/2001 2:04:11 PM Eastern Standard Time
From:    mhartzman3@aol.com


Hello!
One time when I was younger I ate the last pickle and my sister got very upset. She punched me square in the face and tied my shoelaces together so I couldn't get up. Years later I spiked her soda with pickles juice as a meager revenge. I've got more plans. Ever since, the last pickle has been special and dear to me. Is this pickle kosher? How large is it?
Thank you for your help in this matter,
Marc

Damn girls and their pickles.  Will they never learn?  The pickle could be Kosher, but the auction was rudely ended by ebay, so I ate the pickle already.  Sorry.  It wasn't very big, but I'll tell you what, it was damn good.

 

Subj: farside joke 2000
Date: 3/19/2001 12:56:09 AM Eastern Standard Time
From:    drcaligari@triton.net (Spicoli)


hey igor

i won your wonderful farside joke auction.  Send me your address and i'll
send the outrageously overpriced amount of 1 cent.  This is breaking me, you
know.  My family will go hungry for a week.

spicoli

I am sorry to hear about your family, but It's good that you have your priorities figured out.  Besides, once you read the FarSide joke, you could always eat it.

 

Subj: Question for seller -- Item #570323401
Date: 3/18/2001 8:52:35 PM Eastern Standard Time
From:    ebay2001@charter.net


Sir,

Do you think the stale swedish fish would withstand a blunt blow from a hammer?


Thanks for making me laugh!
Allan

Most likely, although I haven't tried. Swedish fish can be nasty fellas.  I wouldn't mess with them if I were you.

 

Subj: Question for seller -- Item #564740032
Date: 2/28/2001 1:53:25 AM Eastern Standard Time
From:    debea@xoommail.com


Hi,
I was thinking about auctioning off ebay's integrity but I don't think I could get very much for it. How's about a trade? I'll send you what their integrity is worth for an equal amount of alien stickers - say about 5? (Henry)

With the slump in internet stocks integrity is going cheap cheap cheap...  Ill take two integrities and a four dollars for 6 stickers.

 

Subj: Question for seller -- Item #1413487784
Date: 3/1/2001 3:11:48 AM Eastern Standard Time
From:    gimp@myfirstlink.net


i was wondering if you accept paypal, i'm kinda low on cash, but this is definitely an item i must have and it will determine just how high i can go on my bids.

thanks,
daren

This is funny because the item he is referring to was one page from 1984.  The bid was at 6 cents at the time.

 

Subj: Question for seller -- Item #1413487784
Date: 3/2/2001 3:11:36 PM Eastern Standard Time
From:    chillsad@ipa.net


Yo Dude! I gotta tell Ya, You're F...ing killing me laughing. ROFGLMAO!  The "Assorted Trash" with "This" is exciteing!!  Everytime I think about it,I die Laughing! Ya,Real exciteing!!  "One Page" "Nubbed in the chest"  Man, You have far to much time on your hands!  I'm no Broad,Fag or nothing like that,so don't get excited! but you are one funny MFer!  Keep up the good work!   You're killing me!!  You're better then the Freak Brothers by far!! The Old Lady thinks you should be committed,I think you should be Cloned!  Can't wait to see what shit you pull next!!  Try "Used Chewing Gum"  "This is exciteing" LOL Big Time!

Thanks yo... buy some of my stuff.  Buy buy buy!  I need your spare change!!