Merry Christmas

Just wanted to get on here late and wish everyone a Merry Christmas. I posted it on Instagram already but I feel like you guys need to see my Christmas card. I sent out about 100 of these in the actual mail but you get the digital version. Actually, if you still want one in the mail I can still make that happen. I got like 100 cards left still and a couple dozen stamps.

Anyway, this Christmas card is actually a Polaroid that was shot at Exxxotica NJ back in early November. I had this idea that I was going to launch my naked Polaroid book Kickstarter December 1st and then people who backed would automatically get a Christmas card but the video wasn’t ready to go by then and I would rather hold off until it was ready. This book is gonna be a big one and I need to do it right. Look for it in early January.

The Christmas card features (from left to right) Dahlia Sky, Cassidy Klein, Cadence Lux, Samantha Rone and Stevie Foxx. The actual photo was taken by Cadence’s boyfriend Nick. I think seeing a bunch of naked girls evened out the fact that he pretty much had to see my balls. I hope you guys feel the same way.

So yeah, Merry Christmas everyone, happy various other winter holidays and New Years and whatever. I am in DC for a few days but I should be back to NYC on Wednesday and back to work getting ready to launch this book.

Another Driven By Boredom Christmas Card

 

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2016 #MetLifeTakeover – 12.16.12

A few times a year I do a post about the Miami Dolphins and you just have to deal with it. On Saturday my Dolfans NYC partner Michelle and I threw a massive event called the #MetLifeTakeover. We run the aforementioned NYC Miami Dolphins fan club Dolfans NYC and over the past 8 or so years we have turned it into the biggest Dolphins fan club in the country and raises tens of thousands of dollars for charity in the process. Our #MetLifeTakeover event has become one of the biggest events on any serious Dolphins fan calendar and we sell around 1000 tickets to the Dolphins @ Jets game every year.

This year the game was on a Saturday night so we did things a little differently. Instead of having a party the day before at our bar Slattery’s Midtown Pub we held a pre-tailgate party starting at noon. We got to Slattery’s around 10am to start setting up and I didn’t get home until around 2am. Long fucking day.

The Dolphins organization has been very supportive of our events and sent broadcaster and former Dolphin Joe Rose to film his show “Cup of Joe” live at our bar. Team vice-president and Dolphins legend Nat Moore came with him to co-host the show. Also one of my favorite players of all time, former CB Sam Madison came up and actually hung out with us all day and even sat in the cheap seats way up top with us. He tried to pay for his tickets but instead we talked him into hosting our #MetLifeTakeover video (coming soon!). It was pretty amazing.

The party was a lot of fun and we did a free raffle and then did a live auction and raised some money for charity. We also raised another $1500 selling raffle tickets to a team signed helmet that the Dolphins sent us. After merch sales all in all we raised close to $3500 not including the money we made throwing the actual event.

The tailgate didn’t go as smoothy as usual. Our normal DJ couldn’t make it and we ended up renting a PA and getting a friend of a friend of a friend to DJ and he apparently didn’t have the right cords and so I spent most of the tailgate trying to figure out how to make that work. Eventually we got some music playing but it was kinda a disaster. On top of that one of the 6 busses we rented broke down so we had to load about 50 people on to the already packed busses. The whole thing sort of killed me but fortunately everyone seemed to have a great time even if Michelle and I were super stressed out.

Thankfully we had some great sponsors again. AQUAHydrate provided a ton of water for the event and we went through a case of Sailor Jerry very quickly as the Sailor and hot apple cider drinks we made were a huge hit. Pabst Blue Ribbon actually came out to the event and passed out gloves that had cup holders in them so you can drink your PBR with incredible style and class. So thanks to all of those guys!

The game itself was fucking amazing. The first half was kinda close but the Dolphins destroyed the Jets in the third quarter scoring 3 TDs in a five minute span. I lost my voice quickly and we could easily be heard on TV cheering for the Dolphins. The NFL Network was joking about how loud we were and how many Dolphins were at the game. A bunch of players mentioned us and the Dolphins social media posted about us several times throughout the night and posted this video the next morning. It was all pretty fantastic.

Anyway, I know most of you guys don’t care about any of this but for those who do I took a handful of photos. Thanks again to PBR, AQUAHydrate and Sailor Jerry. Phins up.

Click here to see photos from Dolfans NYC’s 2016 #MetLifeTakeover.

Fuck The Jets

Sam Madison With Michelle And I

Sam, Super Fans & Omar Kelly

Nat Moore & Joe Rose

Thanks PBR!

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Charlotte Sartre

Back in July I randomly went to Chicago Exxxotica because I had been trying to shoot with this girl I met on Twitter named Charlotte Sartre. We had tried to shoot when I was in San Francisco a week earlier but she got sick and it didn’t happen. We were texting back and forth trying to figure out when we were going to be in the same city again and she mentioned that she was gonna be in Chicago for Exxxotica that weekend and she didn’t really know anyone that was gonna be there and I could stay with her if I wanted to make the trip. I ended up using a few frequent flyer miles and two days later I was in Chicago.

The night I got there we went and hung out with my old pal Draven and they ended up hitting it off and have been dating ever since and that is real fucking adorable. Draven had just had me on her podcast the week before so it was cool to see her two weeks in a row given that I don’t see her that often now that she’s out in LA.

Anyway the next day before Exxxotica started Charlotte and I did a photo shoot that is easily one of my favorite hotel room photo shoots ever. She actually read me her favorite passage from the bible while we shot which was extra creepy. I seriously love the way Charlotte looks so much and every photo was great. It was so fucking easy to shoot her and I can’t wait until we get the chance to shoot again. Hopefully at AVN or something. I seriously love taking her photo.

So go look at these photos because they are fucking great. And there are some really solid extra graphic ones on Girls of Driven By Boredom. I actually thought about posting them on DBB because they were so good but I had to save something for the people who pay me $18 whole dollars a year or whatever it costs. Buy yourself something for Christmas already. Give the gift of goth.

Now click here to go look at all the photos of Charlotte Sartre in Chicago!

Charlotte Sartre

Charlotte Sartre

Charlotte Sartre

 

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Punk Rock & Christmas Cards

1) My punk band is playing our second show ever on Saturday at Otto’s Shrunken Head. Okay, technically that is not even close to true… they have been around for a decade but this is only their second show with me in the band. Okay, that’s not really true either because they played a show when I was in LA last month without me but whatever… it’s only the second show I have played since my last band broke up in like 2012 or something so I am excited about it.

The show is free and we play at 10. It’s the 28th anniversary party for a band called Iconicide. Not sure why a 28th anniversary party is a thing but that’s a long fucking time to be in a band. The last time I played a show with them I gave the singer the mic to do a Black Flag cover with me and he kinda screamed all over it and I was wildly drunk so I decided to flip him over and he hit his head into a cinderblock that was keeping the drums from moving. He was a good sport about it and I am real excited to play with them again. That show was fun as hell.

2) The Driven By Boredom Christmas Card is almost here. You can get on the list for one American dollar. In the past I haven’t charged but if I do it through Etsy it’s super fucking easy for me to deal with it. After the fees and price of the cards and postage and shit I am not making any money I assure you, this is just the easiest way for me to deal with it.

If you aren’t familiar with my christmas cards they are pretty epic. I did make a half assed one a couple years ago but the first two were real solid. The most recent one is pretty great although I must admit they weren’t printed very well. That being said if you want to horrify your friends and loved ones there’s nothing like having one of my Christmas cards on your refrigerator. Also it says Happy Holidays on it instead of Merry Christmas because I am doing my part in the war on Christmas.

Plus if you have all three you can watch my life fall apart in front of your very eyes! Who is that nearly tattoo free babe with the incredible ass? Look at that long luxurious hair looking so slender (in comparison to the Fat Jew)? Oh god, who is that 30 something on the new card? What has become of his life?

GET YOURS NOW!

Oh, and I got some new postcards made at the same time as the Christmas cards that are for sale now if you care about that sort of thing…

Christmas Is Coming...

Christmas With The Fat Jew

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Melissa Moore & Cassidy Klein In 35mm

I have been back in town for a while and I am not sure I have taken a single picture with my digital camera since I’ve been back. I’ve shot some film and some polaroids and I have been hard at work doing stuff like making new Christmas cards (more on that later…), band practice (first show since May on Friday!) and working on this god damn naked polaroid book and the fucking Kickstarter video. The video needs a Kickstarter of it’s own. Worked on the edit all last night and it’s still not done. Anyway, enough of that, let’s look at some photos.

Speaking of not taking any photos with my digital camera, when I shot Cassidy Klein & Melissa Moore I almost exclusively shot film. I was going to shoot Melissa in my creepy LA motel room and Cassidy outside somewhere but Melissa showed up late and Cassidy showed up early and they ended up both showing up at my motel within 20 minutes of each other. I starting shooting digital but the light was ugly so I kinda gave up and shot point and shoot 35mm stuff since the flash looks raw and “cool” that way instead of just looking like shitty photography.

After the shoot they didn’t want to leave because of traffic and my hotel had a hot tub so I ordered a giant pizza and hung out in a hot tub with babes for an hour or something and then they had to shower so I shot some more photos and it was kinda a fantastic way to spend an afternoon. Those girls are kinda great.

When I got the 20 rolls of film back from my trip I noticed I had enough of Melissa & Cassidy to do a whole post so that’s what I did since I don’t have a digital set to put up. Plus it’s nice to post some of my film work on DBB from time to time…. I’m gonna start posting more film on my Instagram too.

Since I always want to give subscribers to Girls of Driven By Boredom a little extra content I uploaded some of the Polaroid’s (okay, Instax Wide technically) to Girls of DBB. I figured that way they get some extra stuff and it gives people a reason to get mildly excited about my instant film book.

Okay, after you go get your Driven By Boredom Christmas card come back and look at some damn photos.

Click here to see some seedy 35mm LA motel photos of Cassidy Klein & Melissa Moore!

Melissa Moore & Cassidy Klein In 35mm

Melissa Moore

Cassidy Klein

 

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