The End Is Nigh

In the future the world will be full of clones and no one will know how to communicate in real life anymore because we will be all plugged into our computers at all times. We will sit in little pods 24 hours a day digesting information from all over the world with out moving out of our cells. Some people will gain the infinite wisdom of the universe, but most people will just spend their time coming up with creative ways to use emotions and to buy novelty pop culture t-shirts to decorate the flesh-shells of their clones that are living their sim life. Or something.

Today I had the shocking realization that time is much closer than we think, and this revelation had nothing to do with monkey cloning or the fact that Gmail insisted on letting me know about their new emoticons. It has every thing to do with one of the videos posted on myspace’s main page today. Watching this video was absolutely spine crawling. The video consists of Chad Vader being interviewed about his political leanings by Obama Girl. For those of you who have a life and are not aware of Chad and Obama Girl, they are two fictional characters featured in over played viral videos. They are representative of the down fall of media and entertainment and now they have crossed over into a world that should not exist. They are FICTIONAL characters, from different spheres of the internets, talking to each other. This video is like that weird movie in the 80’s where all the beloved cartoon characters of the day teamed up to teach you lessons about drugs, except 100 times more horrible and upsetting. I would much rather watch Alf talk about heroin than have to get my political incites from an minimum wage earning Sith Lord and a model who’s entire career is based on a three minute song she didn’t write or sing, or have really anything to do with. What is going to come next? Chris Crocker interviewing Goatse about gay marriage? Maybe LonleyGirl15 and Ms. Teen South Carolina could learn to Crank That. Or a major right wing presidential candidate reciting Chuck Norris facts? Oh wait, that happened. The apocalypse is upon us. Repent!

I am part of the problem. All your base are belong to my dick in a box.

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One Night Stand – 11.29.07

I checked out a new party last night called One Night Stand, which is a sort of great idea for a party name. It is put on by Jake Destroyer. Jake recently contributed to an article in the New York Times about the effect female DJ’s have on fashion. This article has some of the funniest quotes I have ever read in it. My favorite being:

“A lot of these girls are just novelties,” said Alisa O’Connor, 21, of Brooklyn, alluding to the D.J. who flaunts glitter and angel wings to distract from the fact that she is playing prerecorded CDs. But “if she is a good D.J.,” Ms. O’Connor said, “I’m going to respect her for what she wears.”

You are going to respect her for what she wears because she is a good DJ? WTF? That is like a quote from the Onion or something. Sorry, I am getting off topic.

The party is at St. Jarome’s on Rivington east of Essex.  It is a small place, but that made for a very good time and I could see this becoming a great small party.  This girl Abby go-gos and she is better than your standard go-go fare.  I am pretty sure I will be there next week.  I will post the flyer on Wednesday if I think about it.  Anyway, good times were had, but you can see that for yourself.


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C Is For Celebrities

The Alphabet of Photoblogging is an A-Z 26 day long series about what to look for when doing nightlife photography and what to do to get your photo taken. For the rest of the alphabet and more info click here.

Nothing makes a bad photo look great than a celebrity. People have made entire careers out of taking bad photos of celebrities. If you get a photo of a famous person you can leverage it into hits through gossip sites or try to sell it for actual monies. These things are exciting. You also make the promoter of the party happy because his place looks like the spot to be. The only issue celebrities is that you sort of have to be careful around them. If you piss off a celeb by taking their picture you risk them leaving the club which really pisses off the promoters and venue owners you are working for or with. A lot of these people go to clubs to escape all the people outside trying to take photos of them all the time. I usually just walk up and ask them if I can get a photo and if they say no, you have to respect that. I have had a few say no and a few pose with their friends for me. Then again, if Britney, Lindsay, Brad, Angelina or Suri Cruise walk through the door, I am getting the shot no matter what. We all need to eat right?

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Nick The Duke’s Birthday @ 205 – 11.28.07

I have known Nick for a very long time. When we lived in VA I used to hate him because he would always hit on my girlfriend in front of me. Once I broke up with her we became pretty good friends and now that we both moved to NYC and are blowing shit up here it is nice to have someone I have known since back in the day. His partner in crime Krames just moved to the city too and I expect big things from Cobra Kai in the future. They put on the best parties in VA and I am sure that will continue up here. Case in point: Last night.

Last night, with the help of Taste, they brought you some of the finest DJs around including Dances With White Girls and DJ Bloodbath. On top of that Tracy Jordan… I mean Tracy Morgan from 30 Rock was haning with his wife. Evidently they are Taste Wednesdays regulars. They seemed very cool and posed for a ton of photos even though the one I took of them making out was unreasonably out of focus. The truth is I did not shoot well last night. Honestly it was probably the worst night I have had of shooting in a month, luckily the shots of Tracy came out well and made it a good night of shooting anyway. Anyway, click here to see more photos of Tracy Morgan and Nick The Duke.

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Tracy Morgan From 30 Rock

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Tracy Morgan & DJ Bloodbath


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D Is For DJs

 The Alphabet of Photoblogging is an A-Z 26 day long series about what to look for when doing nightlife photography and what to do to get your photo taken. For the rest of the alphabet and more info click here.

I hate shooting DJs.  Nothing is more boring that watching a guy stand over a computer with head phones on.  Once in a while a DJ will get really into it and it will make for some good shots, but it is pretty much a tedious experience.  Unfortunately it is a shot you have to have.  When the main draw of the party is often the DJ you need to get that shot.  A lot of time the person paying you to take photos is the DJ so you know you need to get photos of them.  DJs are also a shot I get early in the night when I am sort of getting comfortable shooting.  The DJ is expecting you to take his photos, when some times others are weary of it if they don’t recognize you.  Once you get a few shots of the DJ people are more ready for you to take photos of them.  If you know the DJ some times you can get them to pose for you and it looks a lot better than them standing over the turntables looking kinda bored.  All that being said, once in a while I get some really good shots of them though… in fact my desktop background is a shot I took of a DJ about a month ago.  Crazy.

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Six Six Sick – 11.27.07

Speaking of birthdays, it was Nick The Duke from Cobra Kai’s birthday last night. His party is tonight at 205 and I will be there taking photos. Anyway, I went to Happy Endings just so I could video tape Marika doing the Gettysburg Address for some reason. But there was not enough light and it sort of turned into a mess so we are going to do it again at some point. I need a video camera with a light on it. Anyway, I met this girl a month ago or something, and last night I invited her to the party. When I met her we got along real well and she was so pretty any everything, but then I didn’t see her for a month. She came out to the party with like five friends including a girl I had to get in because she didn’t have an ID or whatever. I tried to take a picture of the girl who had no ID and she flipped out. She would not accept the idea that I didn’t want to take a photo of her that much, so she spent like five minutes talking to me with her hand over her face. Why the hell would I want to take a photo of a girl who doesn’t want her photo taken. I don’t do this to piss anyone off. It was out of control. So the girl I dug mostly just talked to her friends and we didn’t have a lot of time to talk. I did talk to two of her guy friends who seemed like very cool guys. While I was talking to them the girl with No ID and the girl I like started hugging and looking really cute so I took a picture without thinking about her not wanting her photo taken. I remembered at once and immediately deleted her photos. I told her they were gone but she proceeded to try to break my camera and she hit me in the face a bunch of times including a punch that knocked out the ball to my lip ring. I have lost a bunch of balls in my life, and this was the best one I ever had, and now it is gone. Augh. The bouncers wanted to kick her out, but everyone else with her was cool and I didn’t want them to have to leave because their friend is a psychopath, but the whole thing put me in a really bad mood so I just went home. Photos go here.

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Rebel Rebel – 11.27.07

My friend had her birthday at Lit last night. I had not seen her in a while so I came out for it. I realized I had not shot Rebel Rebel in 2 months so I guess it is good that I got some shots. I spent most of the night talking to another girl who also had a birthday. I was only there for about an hour but I had some fun and I think I took some alright photos. Happy birthday kids.

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E Is For Eyes

 The Alphabet of Photoblogging is an A-Z 26 day long series about what to look for when doing nightlife photography and what to do to get your photo taken. For the rest of the alphabet and more info click here.

I think I have a weird relationship with eyes.  I couldn’t tell you my best friend’s eye color.  I couldn’t tell you about any of my ex-girlfriends eyes.  The truth is I just normally don’t care about eyes.  But once in a while I meet someone with crazy amazing eyes and I am real into it.  I sometimes don’t even notice until I have photographed them, and once I have I pretty much shoot their eyes up close every time I see them.    As you might have noticed, I am a big fan of really up close shots.  I don’t shoot everyone up close, I just shoot them when I get a sense that they might look cool up close.  Usually it is because of some amazing eyes or some nice lips or something… or maybe a horrible disfiguring scar or lack of teeth.  I also make sure to get good shots of anyone with weird fake contacts, even though we all know how silly they are.  I think I want Miami Dolphins contacts… I would look beautiful.

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MDA Vs. Optimum Online Rap Battle

Who wins?  You be the judge!  Puff Daddy must be rolling over in his grave. YouTube Preview Image

VS.

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