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So this is going to be hard to explain,  When I went to college in 1999 at Penn State I never really found anything to do.  I into punk rock and I dressed like some weird raver/punk/rockabilly mix.  There was almost no punk scene at PSU.  I had only a few friends and I didn’t and still don’t drink.  All there was at school was frat parties.  I hated that shit.  Anyway, one day it was freezing out and my friend Dave and I got on the drunk bus that takes people around the campus late at night so they don’t have to drive home or walk around in the snow.  We just drove it around all night and for some reason we had this stuffed monkey with us.  Cute girls kept talking to us about the monkey and I kept thinking about how I wish I had my camera on me cause so many weird things kept happening.  The next weekend I did it again, and then again and again.  I started this website which is the worse designed and organized website of all time.  I was taking all the photos with my roommates APX camera which no one uses anymore.  It was this really tiny film thing and took horrible pictures.  It was before digital cameras so every week I was developing the film and having the negatives scanned which cost a fortune at the time so I only took one roll a day.  After a few weeks doing it a girl wrote an article on me for the school newspaper.  The Penn State Daily Collegian is not your normal school newspaper.  It is the only local newspaper for all of State College, PA and it has a circulation of about 50k.  Every single student reads this… and the put a HUGE picture of me on the cover.  After that I had people talking to me about my site every single day five times a day.  It was so fucking annoying so I quit.  Some girls even made a documentary film about me which I would kill to get a YouTube version online.  I had my 15 minutes of fame and I hated it.  So that’s that.  But let it be known that I had a photo blog before you did so I win… blah.  Loopmonkey.com is a fucking mess so I uploaded all the photos to DBB.  You can see them here.

That title roughly translates to LiveHard’s Fashion Duel Part Four: The Undead Ball.

Last night I went to the LVHRD party. There were several things going on. The main show was a fashion duel between two teams of designers that had to make dresses out of fashion magazines. The second attraction was undead face painting. They had two make up artists making people look very bloody and very scary. The blood was made out of co-co powder and syrup and food coloring so the whole party smelled like chocolate. Also there was a photo booth so you could get your photo taken looking oh so scary. Comedian Dave Hill hosted. I took way too many pictures as you can see here.

If you want to know more about the event and who won, please click here.

Morgan Mae and her boyfriend Doug Sakmann are back for a special pornographic Halloween spectacular.  Did I ever tell you that Halloweeny is my favorite word?  Anyway… Doug dressed up like Chris Hanson from to catch a predator and Morgan dressed up as Jail Bait so they could catch said predator.  Also the set features Sammy as Amy Crackhouse, which was fantastic. Anyway, check out the photos if you dare! Bwahaha…

PS. These are clearly Not Safe For Work.
PPS. If you want to see Morgan naked and having sex with things please go here.

Candy Snatchers in 2001 maybe.  At Holy Chow or Hole In The Wall depending on what year it actually was… Probably Holy Chow.  Hmm… It turns out I have to be in Midtown in thirty minutes instead of 2 hours like I had originally planned so I don’t have time for any more updates today so enjoy this video.  If anyone knows the name of this song, please let me know.

Thanks.

Welcome to completely invasive night life photography 101.  My name is Mr. Igor and I am going to teach you how to annoy the hell out of everyone you take a picture of by sticking your camera into people’s faces, setting off your flashes just inches from their eyes, and posting distorted pictures of their pores, blemishes and mediocre make-up jobs!  You too can annoy your friends just like me!

No, it wasn’t a Halloween party, people just look really fucking scary close up (except ReRe whos photo looks like a friggin’ head shot).  I wasn’t going to take any photos at all last night but I decided that I would work on my close up project at Darkroom.  I am going to make a little book for myself out of all these close ups, but I needed a lot more.  Luckily I got about four or five really good ones tonight and that will go a long way to a 20 page Flickr book.  Anyway, check them all out.  See if you can figure out which one is me as I am in disguise.

And seriously, thanks to everyone who put up with this project last night.

So I go to a lot of stand up comedy. When I first moved here I was going twice a week every week. Now I go a bit less, but I still see a lot of comedians. Of the many, many sets I have seen, the funniest by far was this guy named Bryan Callen. I saw him at Seth Herzog’s Sweet which is every Tuesday night at the Slipper Room in the LES. Anyway, I was on the floor crying. He does this very physical big dick humor that I sort of feel like you have to witness in person to get the full effect. The way he works the crowd is very impressive. This set at Gotham is pretty good, but not nearly as amazing as when I saw him in person. He did this bit about a pet eagle that I did for people probably 30 times. Anyway, aside from a half assed call back at the end, this set is still pretty fucking perfect. I can’t wait to see him again. Enjoy.

These photos are out of order because I took 10,000 photos in the last month or two so the count on my camera reset. So the second half is first. Yeah.

This thing was a bloody mess. Doug Sakmann was doing the make up for the girls in the Zombie beauty pageant and he was spraying fake blood over everyone. I didn’t shoot every well, everything was a bit under exposed, but I got a bunch of half naked girls eating brains, so that’s pretty great. I actually took photos of this one guy that is so gross I am not even going to post it on below. If you you want to vomit, check out the gallery with the rest of the photos.  Oh by the way Bobby Steele from the Misfits and The Undead was one of the judges which was very cool. Yeah.

My friend DJ Lady Byrd has unearthed dramatic before and after photos of Paris Hilton’s plastic surgery miracle. Evidently before Paris was Paris she acting under the stage name “David Duchovny” in some weird Lynchian TV show called “Twin Peaks”, whatever that is. The amazing plastic surgery was done by a Dr. Laura Palmer in a small town in Washington State. This is unbelievable news as most people thought that Paris Hilton was the daughter Richard Hilton the real estate billionaire and one of the heirs to the Hilton Hotel chain. View the shocking proof below!

A Few Of My Favorite Things is a series that appears most weekends on Driven By Boredom. Each week I talk about three of my favorite things from a specific genre of film, music, or something else all together. Each favorite thing is accompanied by a video and a description of why it is one of my favorite things. Click here for more favorites.

Welcome to the Halloween edition of Favorite Things, my weekend blog about three things I dig. Today we are talking about zombies. I love zombies. I got into an argument the other day with someone who tried to say that vampires were better than zombies. That is just bullshit. Vampires are fucking boring. If you get eaten by a vampire… guess what? You get to live forever. Get bit by a zombie? You are just constantly hungry for brains and the chances are someone alive, who is much faster than you, is going to come a long with a shovel or a shotgun and detach your head from your body. That is scary. I am not a big horror buff, but I am a zombie fan. My horror section is probably 60% zombie films. One of my favorite movies of all time is Dawn Of The Dead. Just thinking about it gets me all excited. I sort of want to live the rest of my life in an abandoned shopping mall actually. It is so spooky. Sean Of The Dead was pretty fantastic too… it was probably the funniest horror movie I have ever seen. I have all the Evil Dead movies including the Necronomicon special editions that scream when you press them. I own at least two Re-Animators and Peter Jackson’s Dead Alive and about a dozen more (Redneck Zombies anyone?). Anyway, zombies are amazing and not just because they moan a lot and eat brains… they do a lot of other things too. After the jump I am going to break down my three favorite things that zombies do, so please, read on.

(Read the article)

Rated X has been moving around. This Halloween edition was at the Remote Lounge. There was a special strip dance thing by Velocity Chyalid which was extremely X rated so be warned. It is probably the most pornographic thing to go on this site… lots of fake blood and vagina stabbing. Be warned, very NSFW. There was also a hot body contest so their are some penii and more boobs and stuff. Um… yeah. Click here for lots of costumes, queens and perversions of all types.

Yesterday Trinity was down with 2 seconds left and they lateraled the ball 15 times to win the game on the last play.  It was the most amazing play in football history since the Stanford/Cal game.  Amazing.  Just watch this video.  Even if you don’t like football, this has to be seen.  Wow.

After Wrecked I ran over to Trash for their Halloween party. Because of the rain it was pretty dead, but the people inside had a great time. Pretty much every single person was dancing to spooky hits and monster jams. I stayed late and arm wrestled Richie, took photos in a coffin and watched Michael T do his best minstrel show. I got home around 8 AM after eating at the sidewalk cafe with a motley crew of Team Trash. This gallery is just barely Not Safe For Work but don’t worry, your boss will never notice… Tracy doesn’t really have boobs anyway…. OH SNAP. Just kidding, I love you. Click click.

Jake asked me to come down and shoot his party Wrecked at Revolver on first and Third Fridays.  There was a private party for some striped shirts and they were just standing around talking about finance or Mitt Romney whatever they talk about, but the hipper (hipster?) contingent danced their asses off and a lot of fun was had.  Revolver could use a little work on their sound system though… This party could be a lot of fun in the future.  Dig the photos.  Two photobloggers with blond mullets in one room?  Amazing.

“Fuck You, That’s My Name!  You know why mister? Because you drove a Hundai to get here tonight; I drove an $80,000 BMW; That’s my name.”

Best. Scene. Ever.

My friend sent me this 30 Rock Alec Baldwin clip and it made me think that this scene from Glengarry Glen Ross might be online… and it was. Glengarry is a good movie, but honestly the reason I bought it was so I could watch this scene whenever I wanted. So, now you can too. This scene was not in the original David Mammet play, but he wrote it specially for Alec Baldwin for the movie. Oh man, Baldwin is such a bad ass.  My friend Keith can do this monologue nearly word for word, it is great.  This is great.  You are great.  Watch this clip.

“You see this watch? That watch cost more than your car.”

My friend Teddy uploaded a greatest hits of my friend Ross’ solo music. It is sometimes weird and folky and some time electronic and poppy. Some of this stuff is amazing. Track 2, called , is one of my favorite songs of 2005. I think you should download this zip file at once. Click the album cover for more info, track listing, and individual mp3s.