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So my day job makes me want to kill myself.  Anyone have any ideas of something I could do that wouldn’t make me want to slowly cut off my neck with a nail file from a Swiss Army knife?  I have zero skills, but I have never really been fired and I have done all sorts of weird things in my life.  I ran a magazine, a record label, managed bands, booked shows, booked parties, promoted all sorts of events, photography stuff, I type fast, do some web stuff, I write, I’ve blogged for seven years, I have office experience, retail experience, manual labor experience, have a bachelors degree, and I eat pussy like a champ.  Sorry, that was uncalled for.  So fucking hire me for something ASAP, but be warned, my dream job is to be a hillbilly river boat captain, so if I hear back from Mississippi I am probably going to do that.

PS. I spent way too long working on this:

PPS. That photo was taken in 2002.